Harvey announces 2011 is final Burning Man

26 07 2011

San Francisco, CA –Larry Harvey, the man (and shape-shifting vampire) who pioneered Burning Man, the famous counter culture music and arts festival founded in San Francisco in 1986, which later moved to the desert north of Reno, Nevada, announced that 2011 2012 is its final year. Caught off guard, those in attendance, including a herd of sparkle ponies with their cell phones, twitter accounts and digital cameras at the ready, were stunned into silence before being able to alert the world of the impending disaster rivaled only by the revelation that there is no Santa Claus.

completely unrelated story: UNICORN FLU PANDEMIC!

When pressed for the reasons behind the abrupt end to the iconic festival it was Harvey’s turn to be silent. Clearly stifling tears, he finally mustered up the ability to provide some answers. “We never intended that Burning Man would run forever, but we had hoped to go out a bit differently than this. It just sort of all came together as things often do on the Playa,” he said. Harvey continued, “When we realized we’d actually sell out this year I had an inkling this was the end. When it was clear demand would outstrip supply and market forces came to bear I knew that there was a strong possibility people would abandon the ethos of the event and turn to profiteering by scalping tickets, offering tourist packages and other practices we’ve been opposed to since the beginning.”

Many of the Burning Man Organization members in attendance were teary eyed, including Chief Communications Officer Will Chase, who agreed it was a sad day indeed. “We didn’t want to do this, but it was like watching Ol’ Yeller get rabies. Hard as it was it was better to put him down than watch him go mad and become something ugly and devoid of love.”

Shockwaves are rippling throughout the Burning Man community as hundreds of businesses and artisans that participate in a cottage industry are scrambling in the wake of the realization that they’ll have to get real jobs in two months. Scores of camps and campers are sure to be inconsolable with regard to the fortunes worth of gear, infrastructure, art cars, and costuming that will be rendered useless. Organizers are also worried about what sort of behavior might be triggered during the event as a result of the announcement. Left over structures such as sign posts, art installations and other artifacts are earmarked for private auction with unsold pieces to be part of a permanent Burning Man museum set to open in San Francisco next spring. There is growing concern that Burners will pillage many of the items during the departure from Black Rock City referred to as Exodus.

A somber Harvey remarked, “From drive by shooting ranges to pants cannons we did things out here no one else will. It’s just hard after all the years of hearing the snickers that Burning Man has become too commercial, or that it jumped the shark, only to see it actually happen.”  Choking back tears Harvey concluded, “We had a good run though, didn’t we? Even the Dead had to quit at some point.”

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231 responses

26 07 2011
Booka

Let me get this right: You are going to screw me out of wearing that really pretty outfit I have had planned for next year? This means WAR!

26 07 2011
Laura Marie

Well if you only care about the “cute” outfit you want to wear then you probably should be going in the first place…

26 07 2011
Adam

She never said cute

27 07 2011
Laura Marie

my reply wasnt serious cutoff thejk

27 07 2011
Knucklebiter

A lot of us got it, Laura. Np. ;)

27 07 2011
Anonymous

I love dressing up. I wasnt serious about the post, it cut off my jp,

19 09 2011
Darius

Lol she quoted “Cute” as if she actually said it. Reminds me of the bullshit journalism going on in this article.

28 07 2011
Anonymous

santa’s mom’s a HO!

26 07 2011
Caitlyn Kano

damn this was the only thing keeping me living

5 08 2011
Joey GUillory

Are you serious? It’s time to find a better reason.

26 07 2011
Gramps

I never thought it would end. Thank God.

26 07 2011
Anonymous

It was over when they started letting one person decide what was art and what wasn’t!

26 07 2011
Don Sucio

agreed, when theme camps started cherging to camp.

26 07 2011
Bree

its called everyone helping out so all these extravagant camps can afford what they do…not everyone is rich and we all need a little help sometimes. charging of theme camps benefits only the camp itself while out on the playa…how do you think one person could afford 3000 lightsabers and just give them out so we could all battle together on the playa…burning man is about giving without thinking of your own benefit…this is why its ending, no one really understands the true meaning of burning man anymore…its all “just a party” to you all…but to me it was my home…and that’s being taken away… :’( its a sad day for all the true burning man family

26 07 2011
stradlater

And this is why it’s ending. “You all did this, while I’m the best ever.”

26 07 2011
Listen To The Danielle

I was a part of that lightsaber camp, and one person DID buy all those lightsabers himself. Just sayin’.

27 07 2011
Anonymous

I believe this is a spoof, but I also like what you said. Home is being taken for granted by people who have no idea what BM is about. And if we keep going in this direction it may one day be cancelled….. either way I love your words!

26 07 2011
Max

Has someone been eating the shrooms again?

26 07 2011
Brian Harris

This is sure to incentivize demand for scalped tickets. What a brilliant marketing ploy.

27 07 2011
S

burning man as an organization isn’t going to benefit from scalped ticket sales…..

26 07 2011
Jennifer Scott

Is this for real???? This cannot be…

26 07 2011
Anonymous

You may want to look closely at what The Shroom is…

27 07 2011
Aloha & Soundman

NO this is NOT real. LOL …hellllllooooo people……You have been Punked! hehehehe …..Burning Man ROCKS! )’(

27 07 2011
Anonymous

Burning Man ended a long time ago.
whether you noticed or not.

26 07 2011
consciouscourier

Get out of town.

26 07 2011
G)'(

Please tell me this was a joke.

26 07 2011
G)'(

Someone tell us this is satire. This could do horrible things to the event. Why would anyone be so short sighted as to announce this BEFORE the event?!

26 07 2011
Anonymous

This could lead to rioting at the gate, people forcing their ways in from all directions etc, not to mention tickets going for 5K on eBay right now!! If this is a joke, it is too far and should be removed!

27 07 2011
Aloha & Soundman

OMG! Chill…..YOU too have been punked!!!

27 07 2011
Anonymous

“this could lead to rioting at the gate, people forcing their ways in from all directions ”

cool! lets do it! it’ll be like old times..

29 07 2011
Anonymous

DOGS AND CATS LIVING TOGETHER…MASS HYSTERIA!!!!!!

26 07 2011
Nutmeg Alfredo

Yes, the Black Rock City International Post Office applauds this move by Harvey and the BLM/ORG! Finally, we’ll get to rest.

Neither sleet, nor dust, yeah – that’s been us, lo these many years. We need a fucking break!

Till then, our kickstarter has 12 more days left. All aboard! you want your mail, right? http://pdx.be/brcpo

http://pdx.be/brcpo
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26 07 2011
Anonymous

Relax, people. it doesn’t work that way.

26 07 2011
Chip

come on folks …. your sarcasm-dar is set way too low. if you don’t get that this is a parody, have another cup of coffee and re-read.

26 07 2011
Anonymous

My sparkle pony can’t believe this. It doesn’t understand the Shroom.

26 07 2011
G)'(

If this is satire, it is still in bad taste, in so much as some people may never discover that it is a joke and would act as if it is true on the playa. Mooping. Burning. Disrespecting. The love and care could go out of the event because people would believe there were no lasting ramifications for their actions on the playa. And yes, I mean more so than already is true of some participants. This needs to be shown to be satire officially so the event doesn’t suffer due to misinformed participants.

26 07 2011
Anonymous

NO MOOPING ALLOWED.

26 07 2011
Anonymous

your an idiot… stop taking your self so seriously.

27 07 2011
Anonymous

“…the event doesn’t suffer due to misinformed participants. ”

thats been going on for a long time..

26 07 2011
javali araujo

Larry Harvey, is a live that is the best,.

26 07 2011
Anonymous

Almost as chaotic as announcing God is not real

27 07 2011
Matt

You mean he has been found?

26 07 2011
Anonymous

Um when and where did he announce this???

26 07 2011
Barnaby H. Fry

Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor?

26 07 2011
squeak

hell no!!!

16 08 2011
Anonymous

nothing is over until we decide it is

18 01 2012
Anonymous

I decide it to be over.

26 07 2011
Dawn Fadem

I’m confused and would really like to know if this is true. Sounds true, but with all the comments now I have no idea!

27 07 2011
Aloha & Soundman

NOT True! You too have been PUNKED! :)

13 09 2011
Anonymous

You will remain confused, many, many days from now.

26 07 2011
Anonymous

This could lead to rioting at the gate, people forcing their ways in from all directions, vandalism, another early man burning etc, not to mention tickets going for 5K on eBay right now!! If this is a joke, it is too far and should be removed and made very clear that this is satire.

26 07 2011
Anonymous

if this were true then it would be on the burningman site,some one is spreading panic for profit.

26 07 2011
Gary Young

IT is not true . When you read the article it is devoid of important facts that would be included if it were real. The thrust of it is written to create emotional response. This is a devilish con , the only reason I can’t understand is why the fuck would anyone create this, cause its not for laughs.

26 07 2011
Anonymous

Oh, goody. Now I get to keep all the camp stuff that is stored at my house. Except that damn blow up penguin. That little bitch has got to go.

27 07 2011
Aloha & Soundman

That is FUNNY! LOL hehehehe

26 07 2011
Anonymous

There are more fes†ivals and more magic to make. Burning Man was not the end all be all

26 07 2011
☺ roy marvelous.

I really hope this is a joke.

26 07 2011
Anonymous

I can’t wait to learn that it was BMORG insiders that bought up the tickets and are now profiting as scalpers. Oh the scandal!!!

26 07 2011
Anonymous

I have decided that life likes to fuck people like me over. More often than not. I may be young, only 18, and I have never attended a burning man(was hoping to in 2012), but even I can see the importance in events and communities such as this. It’s just sad to see the founders of such a tremendous positive give in so easily. It must have been hard to start the burning man, even harder to end it. I find it sad they wouldn’t see the third option of fighting to preserve the ingenuity and love that comes with it just because a few have decided to cave in to greed and greeds demands. This is pathetic. I’m sending hopeful vibes to all my bunrning man family I’ll never get a chance to meet.

27 07 2011
Aloha & Soundman

Don’t be so doom & gloom! Burning Man is NOT done. This is a JOKE on everyone. YOU too have been PUNKDED! Go to Burning Man. Life is short! :)

27 07 2011
Anonymous

Don’t go Go to Burning Man. Life is short!

26 07 2011
Anonymous

People who believe this is real—–please don’t camp next to me. Your gloom and woe will be too much of a downer for the Sparkle Ponies

26 07 2011
Vet

If you think BM has been canceled, please don’t come. I’d rather you not be there!

26 07 2011
alphahooker

The Survival Guide guarantees it!!

26 07 2011
raerae

omgyayayay… alphahooker! I know you!

26 07 2011
Anonymous

theshroom.com == theonion.com for burners…

26 07 2011
Anonymous

A lot of people are buying into this – I was at first. If you’re going to make satire you need to make it clear, particularly if the outcome has consequences. The onion does well because by a couple quotes in you get the joke of it, this all seems like it could be legit.

Also, to the elitists in the comments – get over yourselves. Just because someone doesnt know the background of this site and it caused them concern doesnt mean you’re any better than them. If you’re telling people not to come because this attempt at a ‘joke’ wasnt clear to them, then perhaps you need to consider a nice step down from your pedestal.

26 07 2011
squeak

the point of satire is to be satirical. if you cannot tell the difference, you are part of the joke.

26 07 2011
BanZZ

So he’s talking about elitists and you answer that… That’s satire again, innit.

26 07 2011
squeak

sure, ok, yeah.

26 07 2011
squeak

and to be clear, elite != “people who actually know the meaning of words and how to use them”, those are just smart people. :)

26 07 2011
Anonymous

Thanks squeak, so glad to have your smart kind around to benefit us dummies! I get satire – I love good sarcasm laced satire. I posted above because in my opinion, this does not fit that mold or make me reflect on a valid criticism of the subject matter. To myself and apparently many others, this read literally. I believe it’s fair criticism to say that without a posse of people telling others to ‘stay home if you dont get the joke!’.

If the intent was to troll people into thinking it was real, then it worked, and bravo to the author. But to me that’s not good satire, that’s ‘war of the worlds’ satire, and how’d that turn out? If there is valid perspective to be learned from this, it does certainly make clear the tendency for people to want to ridicule others and feel better because they are more ‘in the know’ in comparison. Again, if the forethought was that in depth, then bravo x2!

All I’m saying is don’t let the fact you have a different interpretation of something based on different life experiences let your head balloon into thinking your better than someone else. Anywho – hopefully see you on the playa, so long as it isnt cancelled this year ;)

26 07 2011
Anonymous

And please note tongue placed firmly in cheek on war of the worlds reference :P

13 08 2012
migratoryprimate

The point of satire is to elucidate with egregious and/or absurd examples. “Satire for the point of being satirical” is the definition of ‘being an areshole.’

26 07 2011
Anonymous

Christ almighty people a) do a little research on your news and b) it’s a party. Albeit THE BEST PARTAY IN DA WURLLLLD, but put your funking party hat on an stop the propagation of overblown party anarchy…panarachy?

26 07 2011
HoolaHoops McGee

Propablown Panarchy

26 07 2011
Anonymous

i’m going to go out on a limb here and say that if this many people find it confusing (myself included), it’s incredibly crappy satire. this article is more of a mean spirited prank…just like out on the playa, some people poke fun at the event in a way that is insightful and funny, and others go for cheap misinformation.

btw, i have it on good authority that this is the LAST year daft punk will be going to burning man.

26 07 2011
Anonymous

this guy is a burner…. he just happens to be un-witty and un-funny.

26 07 2011
Jay Trouble

I’ve Spoke with the Officials and Yes this is the Last Burn…But I’m purchasing the rights to Hold it Next year so fear NOT little minds….I’am bringing in a few Corporate Sponsers to make the event more Wholesome and Family Friendly, Walmart has agreed to take care of next years Decorating,there will be vendors, Burgers,Navaho Art(for cheap),lots of new Security so you all relax and know your safe out there….it will be the best Burn TradeMarked ever.

26 07 2011
Anonymous

now thats good satire…. you should run this site

26 07 2011
gz

NEXT year was the best ever.

26 07 2011
Anonymous

I heard last year was the last great year anyway.

26 07 2011
Jennifer Havelka Smith

do you think bassnectar will be there this year?

how the fuck should I know.

26 07 2011
Brenna Bear

lolz. burners love to spread ridiculous rumors every year before, during, and after each burn. it is SORT OF hilarious to hear virgin burners every year tell me that tool, oakenfold, and Deadmau5 will be playing the “main stage,” but I generally clue them in on the tradition of encouraging misinformation. Hopefully this kind of thing is a prompt for people to think critically and not believe everything they hear. also, if you don’t know, regional burns are really where it’s at. I love burningman but bringing that spirit, art, creativity, freedom and community tall up and down the east coast has been more rewarding for me than the half dozen epic journeys i’ve taken to the playa. relax, love, continue the spirit of the event, and check out your local burns too. <3

26 07 2011
Shy

Funnier still I have actually hung out with Paul and ‘Deadmau5′ at the event.

13 09 2011
Gates Ballard

Good for you, the east coast could really use a bit more of the burning man spirit, art, creativity, and freedom.. especially that Jersey shore place.

26 07 2011
Anonymous

Now they know how all the camps/projects that didn’t get permits felt…

26 07 2011
Anonymous

Larry Harvey is just a myth.

26 07 2011
Jennifer Havelka Smith

I hear he’s just photshopped.

26 07 2011
Anonymous

pics or it didn’t happen.

9 08 2011
steve

I put my faith in Harry Larvey

26 07 2011
Mike Van Houten

Actually all you people have to do is click the ‘About’ link of the Shroom site (come on Burners don’t you know what this paper really is?) and you will find it was “born out of admiration of the Onion.” Um hello the Onion? I live in Reno Nevada, Burn central pretty much year round, and there are zero shockwaves here about any breaking news that this is the last Burn. The Playa IS my local burn, only 1.5 hours away!

27 07 2011
Aloha & Soundman

Uh dude…have you been eating those shrooms too!??? We live in Reno. We have been going for years. I don’t know what kind of car you are driving…a jet??? ….not us….with our burner “stuff” in & on top of car & it depends on the traffic….it can take as long as 3-5 hours…FROM RENO. I am a native RENO burner.
But hey you are correct….about the Shroom site! EVERYONE was PUNKED! LOL…………..Burning Man ROCKS! )’(

26 07 2011
squeak

i am just *super* thrilled that we opted for the whole “vip” package this year! am really looking forward to the helicopter rides out to the springs, using the super thumpin art car to get around and the a/c in the fully stocked (thanks ron rico!) rv! who else got platform passes for the burn?

let’s hook up!

26 07 2011
Victor Shakapopolous

All right, knuckleheads, LISTEN UP!

The description of the “herd of sparkle ponies” in the second sentence was your clue that this article is satire, as if the general silliness of Larry Harvey blubbering was not enough.

That is all. Carry on.

26 07 2011
Marco

Lame, now San Francisco will be fileld with annoying playa hipsters for the two weeks they’d ordinarily be gone every year. I guess the neverending torrent of faux muppet fur and tacky outfits is returning from whence it came. *sigh*

26 07 2011
Stevie G

Long live the playa hipsters!

26 07 2011
Anonymous

“from whence” is improper, redundant English.

- annoying playa hipster

13 01 2012
Jo Momma

“annoying playa hipster” is redundant english

26 07 2011
D. Miles Jr. - The GodFather of Skate

We can all meet out at the end of the pier on the playa and jump off in protest. It’s a 3 ft jump. I’ll have to adjust my playlist at the roller disco. How about “Another one bites the dust” and “Hit the Road Jack”. I’ll have to ban the “Happy Happy Joy Joy” song. Oh well, I guess I’ll get in here and vote to raise my personal debt ceiling again.

26 07 2011
Courts!

I am brand new to BM this year and fell for this hook, line, and sinker, announced it to my veteran Burner friends on our camp google site, and hoo boy! I hope this is the last of my hazing rituals.

26 07 2011
Anonymous

make sure you ask for your spanking at the Gate…

26 07 2011
Laura Marie

Course this is legit! its only Burning Man’s Least best newspaper! Just say’n :p

26 07 2011
Playa Tigger

All I can say is ha Ha HA HA HA HA Ha HA, some funny shit!

26 07 2011
Rachel Kantstopdaphunk

there is a god!

26 07 2011
Anonymous

This is a HOAX!! It will happen again if not somewhere else is what im hearing.

26 07 2011
Anonymous

I am rioting the Gate with all my friends!

26 07 2011
Viola

The attendants of burning blame rub their eyes and blearily step back into life. Burning man was becoming a bit of an organized religion. This festival shouldn’t be the highlight of your year.

26 07 2011
Stevie G

Sometimes it’s just one of many highlights in a year. But it’s usually pretty amazing, still. And I’ve been going since 1998 so I’m not one of those who always say “oh, it’s no good anymore, like the old days”.

27 07 2011
BM95

1997 was the last good year, IMO.

26 07 2011
Stevie G

Come on, it’s called “The Shroom”. Like The Onion, get it?

26 07 2011
Anonymous

This is probably related to the ebay tickets for sale for 10grand right now…

The people going are ignorant to the ideals of which it originally was founded.

26 07 2011
Bruce Deliversrants Walker

The only constant is change :)

I’ve never been to BM, and yes, fair call, i’ve missed the early days pre-circus. Still – to everyone who longs for the ‘good old days’ or wants a party staying true to this or that principle, why wouldn’t you just create a new one yourself?

I understand, parties are always wicked at the start, when they’re small and crew orientated, word of mouth deals – unfortunately, if a party rocks, people hear about it. Then they talk about it. If you keep doing the party, and it becomes an annual event, yes, you’ll get tourists.

I started an event myself because i wanted a certain kind of party (from what i understand, kinda like the halcyon days you rant about here) and because i like the crew / friends vibe, we’re going to change the name every couple of years so the sheep hopefully never catch on. Will that work? Dunno. Fact is, any event can only go in a few directions – it can try to stay underground (ie: invite only) – it can grow (leading to a spiral of higher logistics costs, legal regulation, rules, lack of free-expression cos you just can’t drive a flame-throwing tank through a random crowd, and ‘selling out’ chants from the founding mom n dads – or, it can just go away or splinter into something new.

I’m going to try a hybrid approach and see how that flies. ie: only book acts which 90% of people in this part of the world have never heard of, but which are awesome. (and limit tickets massively – we cover costs but by design, we pour any profit back into the event community – hopefully, such a charter means no individual – including me – makes much profit and with no potential for such, the temptation to corporatise is less.) I could be full of shit though.

Of course, this means i’m never going to get rich. Who cares? Love not money, i get by. ;)

Er.. short answer (yeah i know, you didn’t ask for a thesis from a random) – if BM sucks to you:

- Drink a cup of cement
- Harden the fuck up
- Make a Party
- Book Skazi
- Tell your Friends
- If it’s awesome, work out how to keep it that way
- Deal with all the whining from people who came to the first one, but
hate that other people heard it was good, so came for that reason
alone, without understanding the spirit behind the original rave.
;) <3

26 07 2011
Anonymous

If you actually think people read past the first paragraph, you are kidding yourself. why dont you start a blog and follow your own advice instead of trying to create it here?

13 08 2012
migratoryprimate

I read the whole thing. I apologize for not having the attention span of a marmoset.

9 09 2011
Anonymous

I read way past the first paragraph. Just sayin’

26 07 2011
Justin Sterling Page

this means next year is free,,, bring your own porta john….. :)
and plenty of ice…

26 07 2011
Fred D. Freeloader

The Shroom, The Onion, The National Lampoon, Christ on a crutch, get a grip……

26 07 2011
Anonymous

Don’t worry, Golden Voice or Clear Channel will pick up where the Borg left off. Don’t forget to tip the t-shirt vendors!

26 07 2011
Miles

Don’t worry, Golden Voice or Clear Channel will pick up where the Borg leaves off. And I bet the official t-shirts are gonna RULE.

26 07 2011
DvD

Best Burning Man Icon- ever.

26 07 2011
Stevie G

Yes, it’s all over everyone, yep, all over. So don’t bother going online next January and buying tickets, no sir. Just move along, nothing to see here folks. It’s over, spread the word.

26 07 2011
Sergeant Wunderschnitzel

Anonymous: you’re the best! I’m an Aussie burner back again this year (for the last time unfortunately), we love a good joke down under mate and you are absolutely KILLING it. I’m wetting myself laughing at your posts. Keep up the good work, mad love and respect… Sergeant Wunderschnitzel

26 07 2011
Moof

Hey- where is the DMCA takedown notice for using Harvey’s name or the Burning Man likeness? Also I hope the 10% tithe of your ad revenue is being paid in full to BMORG. They are watching. Always… well except if you are cool. I heard you even get to urinate on the playa if they like you.

26 07 2011
Anonymous

i’m pretty sure if it was the end of burning man it would be on the main website, and there’s nothing so this has to be a joke. not that i care, i doubt i’ll ever go there. anything in america cannot be awesome, and common DUST ?? not the brightest place to have a good time.

26 07 2011
bbYd011

This article is written in the spirit of many Burners. It is in jest, very wry, sardonic jest, but jest all the same. All the people crying that it is too far… if you’re going to step over a line, you’d better make sure you’re miles over it rather than just toeing the line. If you can’t handle the heat… you should probably stay out of the fire… or BRC for that matter. Mischief runs rampart through the city, people ride up to you on their playa bikes just to yell “fuck you!” and ride away, others wielding megaphones and hurling insults “you call that a costume? GO HOME YOU FUCKING HIPPIES!”

It’s a beautiful thing.

26 07 2011
trinityx

I will hate theshroom for this article. not funny and in bad taste. but whatever, do what you want.

26 07 2011
TheShroom

Don’t worry. We will.

13 08 2012
migratoryprimate

Don’t tell me what to do!

26 07 2011
Anonymous

Whoever posted this obvious satire, I hope you do a stand up routine on the playa, at center camp so I don’t miss it. Because this shit is funny. . .Dork.

26 07 2011
Anonymous

Needn’t worry about the DMCA, but watch out for the Google Mothership.

No more BM! wewt. I’ve heard that upon receiving this news, a fellow DPW representative was quoted as saying “Fuckin’ A, goddam about time.” And then went on about something involving blindfolded lake bed racing, whiskey and fully automatic weapons around the same time and location next year. BYOG, and sparkle-motion casket.

26 07 2011
diego love

People – have you heard of “The Onion” a popular satirical newspaper which names bares an uncanny parallel to “the shroom” They are all for shits and giggles. Dr. Dre did not start burning man, the event was not sold out in January, no wikileaks drama about the BORG, why believe this one?

26 07 2011
TheShroom

Will you be quiet? Don’t ruin our fun.

26 07 2011
BMBrB

You guys have all misread this article completely! What they meant to say is that BM has been cancelled THIS year! So, return your glow sticks and your 2cB, stop making your Dubstep mp3 mix, renege on your Cruise America contract and go back to your job at the law firm.
Sorry, you missed your chance to be “creative” this year. Maybe you can use the money you saved to finally take that photography class at the community college.

26 07 2011
bughouse

wow… i thought burners were, uh, smarter than most.

26 07 2011
lol

I will believe it when I see it. This kinda rumor mill happens EVERY YEAR!

26 07 2011
Anonymous

These comments just go to show that the percentage of down right stupid people is the same for “burners” as it is for the population at large.Of course the same goes for smart folks too.
Silly blissninny twits- all it would take to utterly screw BM would be three days of solid rain right before the gate opens..not terribly likely but not unheard of. Some of y’all really need to get a grip and stop treating it like a cult. Honestly i think thats ruined the event as much as the rich folks.

26 07 2011
Marc

It was my understanding Larry had already moved to a dacha on the black sea?

http://consumptionblog.com/2011/02/17/tea-party-ask-is-burning-man-foreign-born/

26 07 2011
weewilly

What is Burning Man?

26 07 2011
LustyKlown

Long live the regional burns, like Critical Massive in the pacific northwest, that are thriving around the world. It is NOT going away!

26 07 2011
Anonymous

so wait………..HES A FUCKIN SHAPE SHIFTING VAMPIRE!?!?!?!?!

26 07 2011
Anonymous

Even though your narrow minded blog site is a parody (which isn’t exactly evident when you happen across it via google), your choice of subject matter is in bad form and poor taste. One should never “quote” someone that isn’t true or was never actually said by that person. That’s a cheap way of getting a laugh and is downright bullshit. So why don’t you put your creative forces (and i use that term liberally here) to work and become a little better at posting propaganda that doesn’t hit so close to home for the less informed that come across your stupid and lame blogsite. May you drink from a pee funnel in your drunkin stupor while on the playa this year for this kind of crap.

27 07 2011
Lizifer vonFunshine

How much “less informed” can one be? Satire: it’s not just for Larry Flynt anymore. If you can’t read the titles of other posts, I’m not sure that’s the fault of The Shroom. I mean, for the love of dust, there is an article about the UNICORN FLU here.

Seriously?

27 07 2011
AHHHH!

holy hell you’re an idiot….. for the love people…. Now I realize that BM is a religion and this is your annual pilgrimage to worship the almighty man (not to mention, is burning a bunch of wood environmentally friendly??). Get over yourselves, its just another festival and thus not too sacred to be fodder for a satire blog.

It is not the Shroom’s responsibility to make sure you have the mental capacity to understand what the hell a JOKE is.

thanks for adding to the long list of why BM is a useless event that is a menace to Nevada.

26 07 2011
Drewzilla

This is why we never shroom alone!

26 07 2011
Martin

Why not just create a ticketing system that’s egalitarian (e.g. a lottery system), and putting into place safeguards preventing the resale of those tickets???

3 01 2012
TheShroom

Gee Martin. Thanks a ton.

26 07 2011
Anonymous

but where will all the shirtcockers go? will assholes with megaphones have to roam random city streets aimlessly? just who will wear the surplus of neon fur, glow sticks, and goggles? what has the world come to? oh my god, i knew 2012 was going to be bad, but not this bad.

26 07 2011
FourthGeneration Chico

Is this for real? Can I really enjoy the isolated peace of the Blackrock without a bunch of hippy freaks desecrating it? It seems too good to be true. I pray that it is and we can keep these fucking freaks out of the high desert and in the city where they belong.

26 07 2011
Anonymous

best news ever. except, wait…. does that mean that all of these douchebags will stay in town in August?!?! UGHGH!!!!!

26 07 2011
MM

I can’t say how much I enjoy reading the rants of people who “love” Burning Man and hate ruthless satire, it’s one of the rare pleasures in life. At the risk of sounding elitist, or at least educated, I would point to the fact that the event began as a prank and Larry Harvey was simply invited along, because he chose to cooperate with cops in SF and not burn the man on Baker Beach that year. What you call Burning Man began as a Cacophony Society ritual call the “Zone Trip,” you can look up “Zone Trip #4″ and read about it.
The mode of satire with the intention of collaborative art is what made the transformation of Disneyworld and Las Vegas possible.
Without the satire(yes, very ruthless satire) your precious experience will settle right back into old forms, as it has been doing for years.

26 07 2011
bbYd011

YES…. YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES!
YOU!!! I could KISS you!

26 07 2011
Chris Weitz

Yeah, but satire demands a degree of literary ability and elegance — at the risk of sounding elitist.

This is just well-pastiched information laced with malice.

best,

Chris Weitz

26 07 2011
Anonymous

…perhaps it’s time to ride my sparkle pony into the sunset, if only to get caught in the trash fence….

this satire was a good laugh. So many gullible gullivers falling for it.

26 07 2011
bbYd011

Good art moves you. ‘Nuff said.

26 07 2011
Chris Weitz

Inept, poorly measured sub-Onion satire=hoax.
Not impressed.
Chris Weitz

26 07 2011
Anonymous

What’s Burning Man?

26 07 2011
BO

In a way it is true. Black Rock City LLC that runs Burning Man is being changed into a non profit organization. So out with the old and in with the new!

26 07 2011
Anonymous

we had a good run

26 07 2011
Pony Trainer

They only thing I saw was SPARKLE PONIES!!!!!!!!!!

26 07 2011
MM

It’s clear that Chris thinks it’s in poor taste, but to criticize it as a text, as poor satire is a bit strange. It’s a prank, not a satyrical text(what text is it satirizing?), and judging by the responses, it was quite an effective one. So the writing must have been adequate at least.
Confusion is the shadow of ambiguity and those who cannot live in ambiguity always try to reduce the world to a simpler one that they can understand, by any means necessary. It leads to fundamentalisms and eventually violence.
These pranks are useful in revealing dangerous literalists who don’t know how to think, and here I’m not thinking of Chris who actually is sophisticated in his views.To focus on the prank as being bad because it’s “mean” is to lack the capacity to step back and see the bigger picture. It’s like saying that Max Ernst or Marcel DuChamp is bad because their work lacks beauty. Yes, it is reactionary and yes, the thing reacted to is ugly, whether it be the first world war or the atrocious commodification of b man tix. But the ethic of the trickster is to be the guardian of homeostasis. If the gofer pops up, he will bat it down, or cause another one to emerge with its head turned upside down.
Sometimes, as in this case, it is a gross exaggeration of the logical outcome of a process. We may not like it, but this is actually an opportunity to tune our vision into a mode of perception that can see through bull shit and clear the way for more truthful wholes to emerge.
As far as the possibility of violence at the gate because of this shroom article, really? As if it won’t be cleared up by then, as if we can’t look at the web site, as if Harvey won’t make a counter announcement at some point if necessary?
As I said in the last post, a slightly sadistic and reactionary chaos was the crucible through which the sacred burning man was born. Clowns calling bull shit on every possible thing they could and blowing things up. It’s a dangerous catharsis, but one so honest that the result is something real for a change.

26 07 2011
Anonymous

If you want to keep burning man make a BETTER ONE!!!! Nevada sure would love that revenue…

26 07 2011
LMAO

Best burner troll I have seen yet

26 07 2011
Anonymous

you want to avoid scalped tickets, PRINT NAMES ON THEM. closing burning man due to commercialism would be the most anti burning man thing you could do.

27 07 2011
Steve

To be honest, I did not understand anything of this story!

27 07 2011
BMBrB

So, Daft Punk isn’t playing this year?

27 07 2011
weeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Fell for it hook line and sinker – then came back for another looked and howled with laughter “World’s Largest Shrew Files World’s Largest Lawsuit” how the hell did I not notice that the 1st time… ha haaa

27 07 2011
weeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

another look sorry – was excited about shrews and mistyped

27 07 2011
taximan

love it!

27 07 2011
N/A

I never even got to go :( Guess I’ll never get a chance now.

27 07 2011
Scott Michael Harris

this is the right reason to end something, and the right time for others to create something new. Death is an important part of any project. All this means to me is there’s an opportunity to find the next NEW and amazing experience.

He’s right, anything awesome eventually attracts a wider and wider audience until it’s no longer what it once was. Here’s to the next thing, and those who will make it awesome.

27 07 2011
David R Mccoy Jr

Aww…so long fun times

27 07 2011
Anonymous

This is completely in the spirit of Burning Man, so leave your angry comments, please do whatever you like!

27 07 2011
It’s the Last Burningman, According to Founder: “Having Sold Out This Year, The End Was Inevitable” |

[...] The notorious Burningman pranks and rumors have already begun. Yesterday, the The Shroom Reported the end of Burningman and Facebook blew [...]

27 07 2011
Anonymous

Hilarious how many gullibles folks are still commenting as if true. Best hazing ever. Kudos Shroom! READ people!

27 07 2011
DK

Something smells fishy. To announce this is the final Burning Man BEFORE the event, leads me to think (ah the real world cynic is going to come out now) that there is probably something else, having to do with missing money, unethical behavior on the part of BM organizers, or head honcho, etc. It makes absolutely no sense to do this at this time.

All the BS that is part of the party line, BM selling out yada yada, just doesn’t cut the muster. It will be interesting to see if there is some grand jury, police investigation or other worldy things in the works.

Can it be cut and run while he/they still can? It will be interesting to see this play out. The timing makes no sense, in light of the BM staff acknowledging the potential problems, probably actually enticing some to such violence. Something doesn’t smell right.

27 07 2011
DK

Hummm…maybe I was premature…is this just another rumor and not true at all?? I would hope it is just a wild rumor and has no basis. Mea Culpa if it is not true for previous post.

27 07 2011
Anonymous

What’s really funny, to anyone who knows anything about BM at all, who’s ever even bothered to talk to Larry, you would know he let go of making BM happen many years ago. He couldn’t stop it today if he wanted.

How do you kill a thing that you burn each year, and yet it keeps coming back? Paul Addis gave it his best shot, and look how that turned out. BM is the evil un-dead zombie mother of large burn events.

- yo momma

29 07 2011
FourthGeneration Chico

BM is evil, that’s for sure…Damn hippy freaks desecrating the sanctity of the Blackrock.

27 07 2011
John Griogair Bell’s Blog » Blog Archive » links for 2011-07-27

[...] Harvey announces 2011 is final Burning Man « The Shroom "When we realized we’d actually sell out this year I had an inkling this was the end. When it was clear demand would outstrip supply and market forces came to bear I knew that there was a strong possibility people would abandon the ethos of the event and turn to profiteering by scalping tickets, offering tourist packages and other practices we’ve been opposed to since the beginning." (tags: 2011 calendar community culture) Share this:No tags for this post. [...]

27 07 2011
Tex Allen

Dear Teh Dumbz who didn’t realize this is satire, nor check the source:

Please sell your tickets at face value to people who need them.
You are not smart enough to be at the Burn and would definitely hurt yourself (or others) It’s obvious you cannot read and will get in trouble, even during the daytime. Please go to ePlaya and list your ticket now.

Thanks from a concerned Burner :)

27 07 2011
rich deutchbagge

WOWZERS!!!
the “article” was pretty good. but, reading all these asinine comments has been a seriously entertaining time! and, i feel fairly confident that the writer was, in some measure, expecting something along these lines. therefore, it was a brilliant piece!!! congratulations!

27 07 2011
Martha May

I have never been to Burning Man. I’m a college student who hasn’t been able to afford the time off from school, or the 1000 mile trip. I was planning to go in 2012, and had just started making preparations. I’m very upset. Burning Man is something I’ve wanted to be a part of for years, and now, I’ll never get a chance to go. There are so many others who, like me, wanted to enjoy this life-altering experience. We wanted to chance to prove our self-reliance, to support a community, to create and appreciate art on a grand scale, and now, it seems as though we are being denied that chance. I hope that the Burning Man community will rally, so that even if Harvey choices not to continue with Burning Man, the community will continue the event to the best of their ability. I truly hope to be at Burning Man in 2012, regardless of who organizes it, even if that person has to be me.

27 07 2011
Anonymous

Sweetie, wait ’til you read about the Unicorn Flu Pandemic! Hold onto your sparkle ponies!

27 07 2011
john

MM, folks like you have been denied the real Burning Man experience for many years now. Harvey just didn’t have the guts to end it when anyone with integrity would have.

You are absolutely right – you should organize the event you want! gather some co-conspirators, and make something new and better! (or at least as good as the old BM was. it was pretty cool)

27 07 2011
Let me in and let me out!

Every year has been the last year for Burning Man and that is how we lived like it was our last!

27 07 2011
MB

“this needs to be officially labeled as satire so people don’t get upset like this”

“satire is only funny when it’s obvious and not harmful”

God bless the pranksters!! I live for this shit.

27 07 2011
Anonymous
29 07 2011
FourthGeneration Chico

Yes!! Fuck Burning Man and the horse it rode in on!! There should be no hippy freaks desecrating the sanctity of the high desert!

28 07 2011
novenator

Ignore all rumors of cancellation.

28 07 2011
The Fat Lady to sing at this year’s Burning Man?

[...] journal The Shroom  have wreaked panic in a ‘burner’ village with their article that claims this year’s Burning Man is to be a [...]

28 07 2011
Brian

I have absolutely nothing interesting to add.

28 07 2011
decidida74

I’m sad to see it end, but glad that I was able to grab a ticket on Day 1.

28 07 2011
Bubbles

People are STILL being trolled by this article! Even after The Shroom changed it, as to tip the reader off to the satirical nature of it. Unbelievable.

28 07 2011
Jeff Zelnio

Thanks for making my job as a regional contact more difficult. Just spent 4 emails convincing a newbie that it really is satire, best comment in that thread, “its the newpaper for the burning man. did you read the artical its pretty legit” . Well played Shroom, well played..love it! :)

28 07 2011
TheShroom

You’re welcome.

28 07 2011
Gavisto

Well,damn! If this is the real deal it blows!! Kept sayin I’m gonna make it out one year,but I guess that wont happen.

28 07 2011
Mike Miller

wow that super huge penis I made for next years burn that was spose to be cristened by all the burn ladys yaya’s aint even gonna smell like a 100 yr old dead carp aww crap Imna just shoot myself

29 07 2011
wonderhussy

I think it’s for the best, honestly. Burning Man totally jumped the shark…it’s more like a big frat party rave these days anyway.

29 07 2011
barbarianhead

This was a fun read…..basically sums up the whole experience. Isnt confusion, inner turmoil and re-evaluation the point of the whole thing. I Love the pranksters the most….welcome kids! and wake the fuck up.

29 07 2011
Anonymous

in 1995 i wandered out of my backyard of winnemucca about 50 miles from the black rock to this amazing event driving a mustang 100mph across the desert from beat to beat from bright light to bright light and every labor day since then minus 3yrs i have continued to go out to experience a more incredible event each and every year bringing along with me at least 1 new virgin each year that continue to go with me to this day and there is a reason for this due to the fact that it is such a magical place that gets me through the entire year by all of the love and kindness that is shown day after day night after night on the playa and it is how people should treat one another when u do come back to the daily grind on earth so i will see u all once again this year and come join us lets get down have a great time and treat one another just like we always do on the playa with lots of love and respect look for us on the helicopter beating up the desert oh and to the guy with the comment above about hippies ruining the desert u have got to b one of the more closed minded people who have no clue and obviously have never been to the burn so stay at home and play your x box

31 07 2011
Anonymous

Even if a joke, should the truth hurt? I have been to BM twice, am unlikely to return, but I’m always happy (especially for the virgins) when the end of August hits.

Take it as you wish, I’m thinking of you when I am not there physically.

2 08 2011
5 08 2011
Joey GUillory

I really am disappointed because I will not be able to enjoy the delights of the festival. 2010 wasn’t as magical as my 2009. Some of my best friends are going this year for the first time. Atleast they will be representing with my costumes I have given them. What i wonder is what or who will take this events place? I have heard the rumors about this ending. i also wonder what will the regulars do now? Where will they spend their 1000s and 1000s of dollars on for weeks worth of fun?Where will we go. To fill this empty space? Where will i go to be naked, costumed, and social? My mind draws a blank…

5 08 2011
Poon Man

Thank God its finely over with, all those pussy loving old geezers getting poon in exchange for booz or water.

7 08 2011
Anonymous

Good What are these “tree hugging” libs gonna do now. What a shame

6 09 2011
Scott Lahteine

I on’t know about anyone else, but I’ll be working hard, educating myself, and practicing to become a better musician, writer, and computer programmer, so that I may continue to live a good life and to be able to help others less fortunate than myself. You?

9 08 2011
TheShroom

To ensure this type of quality reporting reaches the Playa this year please visit our IndieGoGo site and donate to The Shroom to help us with printing costs this year!

http://www.indiegogo.com/The-Shroom?a=220106&i=addr

11 08 2011
your mom

this article is a hoax….it was refuted by Will Chase in an article of the Jack Rabbit Speaks…see you all on the playa…this year and next!

11 08 2011
TheShroom

Aren’t YOU the quick one.

17 08 2011
Anonymous

hahahahahahahaha awesome keep up the good work kudos to everyone at the shroom

19 08 2011
Scarleh!!!

Ah fuckers!!

Just made a dick of myself on facebook announcing this :)

You’ve won this round Shroom!!!

19 08 2011
ChrisO

Great article. Good coverage. Amazing ass-detector.

23 08 2011
Anonymous

ALL YOU KIDS SIT HERE WORRYING ABOUT A LITTLE FESTIVAL WHILE THERE’S CLEARLY A UNICORN FLU PANDEMIC UNRELATED ARTICLE! Oh em geeze this was funny to read all the responses and arguments about a fake story.

29 08 2011
Lucy

Make sure to check out Zocalo Public Square’s article on Burning Man:

http://zocalopublicsquare.org/thepublicsquare/2011/08/28/wanna-get-naked-and-drink-absinthe/read/nexus/

31 08 2011
Joyce

War of the Worlds all over again.

31 08 2011
Massive NYC Effigy Will Go Up in Smoke at What Might be the Last Burning Man … - The NYC Info News 24-hours in New York City, delivering breaking news and features about the five boroughs. - The Nyc Info

[...] York City for the sake of setting aflame an epic 12-foot model of New York City at what might be the last Burning Man Festival ever at the Blackrock Desert in Nevada (now through Sept. [...]

3 09 2011
ravicher

hahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahah!
Regional Burns forever more! State of Jefferson is splitting off.
Lots of good points here, but we all know that this is the future…. that is unless you can reason away the gross unsustainablitiy in light of thousands of city folks losing their egos, for a brief moment… sorry, just doesn’t cut it for me… all the AC and generators… and the shit, where does it all go?
love ya all, and yes, I still wanna go next year.

ravicher

3 09 2011
Belly Jelly

Over consuming and hypocritical is what it’s become. Good luck losers!

6 09 2011
Scott Lahteine

It’s true. But if you’re just a couple of people who drive in and pitch a tent you can feel okay about yourself. It’s a fun way to spend a week, and so many things to do – talks, classes, massage, yoga… There are a lot of things at Burning Man that are simple, communal, and not wasteful.

6 09 2011
Anonymous

2011 25yr BM aniversity…..2012….26 yr cycle into a new age……its an art show and we are the art…see you there even if i camp out alone…….
JFH^^

11 09 2011
Anonymous

January 18, 2012
Burning Man 2012 tickets on sale

14 09 2011
Insphyre Fire Performance

LOL BM WILL NEVER DIE!!!!!!!!!!!

19 10 2011
Burning Man

[...] fucking sucks! Day late and a dollar short. http://theshroom.wordpress.com/2011/…l-burning-man/ GS_googleAddAdSenseService("ca-pub-9888434945255495"); GS_googleEnableAllServices(); [...]

13 12 2011
Anonymous

I feel so bad for the dirty drug hippies out there.

17 12 2011
timmy

I started reading this and was in awe, than i realized hell no! All of the recaps for the last few burning mans talked about how burning man is better than ever. I cant say myself because i’ve never been.
But from the reserch ive done it doesnt seem like the burners would take no for an answere. I feel likeThey would all show up at black rock city and have a festival weather it was techniqually organized or not. Keep it going birners, i hope to take a trip out to my first burning man when i turn 18, no way am i going to live my life without going to burning man! It just sounds too good to be true

28 03 2012
kozuyo

great, another year of sucking depleted uranium dust from Sierra Army depot at Honey lake,seriously it’s the “testing” ground for DU tank and artillery round practice. Probably why there is cancer in off the map numbers in the local towns. Public health advocates have followed this for years and there is no wonder why the Bush boys gave extended permits to the burners laughing their asses off in DC. Yes you have been duped, but it wasn’t by the shroom! Just explore the prevailing winds and dust storms,sit back in your playa home and write your wills, THEY will help you prepare for your burn.

18 08 2012
Anonymous

Hahhahha. Man what a massive load of funny ass replays to this writeup actually more entertaining than the piece – respect to you all !!

13 04 2013
Biuro tłumaczeń rosyjski

Asking questions are truly nice thing if you are not understanding something
completely, but this article offers good understanding yet.

17 04 2013
http://www.Harnest.com.sg

He thought that the chunk of property, that she discarded initially thinking it.
In several Simpsons episodes, Lisa and Bart can be found watching and laughing at Itchy and Scratchy killing each other.
Here is nice news that Spongebob has won the award
just for this year depending on the kid choice.

26 04 2014
daft punk around the world

daft punk around the world

Harvey announces 2011 is final Burning Man | The Shroom

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