The 10 More Questions Every Burning Man Virgin Should Ask Themselves

8 08 2014

There’s an article by Chip Conley called “The 5 Questions Every Burning Man Virgin Should Ask Themselves” that we felt was Just The Tip and needed a good thorough pounding completion.

Not really related to this article

10 questions every BM virgin should ask themselves:

 1. Is this a costume or just something I bought in a thrift store?

2. Am I really receiving divine guidance or is it just that I’m tripping balls inside a 150 degree port-a-pottie?

3. Am I just going to lie here during sex or am I going to participate?

4. Not really a question, but seriously, why the fuck did you #2 in our RV? We all agreed to poo in the port-a-potties.

5. Wouldn’t it be more productive to be compassionate of the tits?

6. Is he wearing a condom?

7. Are they wearing a condom?

8. Whose tent is this, and why am I still wearing a condom?

9. What can I do right now to make sure that next year I can honestly say, “Burning Man was better last year?”

10. How may I best serve thee, O long-time, hardcore Burner?

 

 

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