Editorial: What our Fine City on the Playa Needs Now is a Sports Bar

A Letter from the Editor

You know what the worst part is about Burning Man? No, not the heat, not the undercover cops, not the gonorrhea outbreaks, it’s the lack of a good sports bar. I mean how hard could it be for someone to open one up? You could even call it something like ‘O’Shea’s Sports Bar Camp’.

Who will step up to the plate for this home run of an idea? Don’t even try to argue that there’s a shortage of big-boobed girls willing to wear next to nothing while serving a real sportsman like me. I guarantee you’d have at least one good customer. Do you know just how many blowjobs you could get for a good basket of Buffalo wings? I’m even willing to concede a few points to the heat – no ranch or blue cheese dressing.

The editorial staff of this newspaper would even help clean up a little at the end. We could even open up a sports book. This is Nevada after all. If we are ever to realize our dream of having a Black Rock City sports franchise we must first show a commitment to the televised sporting event! And you know what the best part would be about O’Shea’s Sports Bar theme camp? We could burn it at the end.